fact check

so out of morbid curiosity, i actually looked it up.

to be precise, my internal clock thinks i live in hong kong.

on moscow time

last night i had a ton of work that was due first thing in the morning, and i couldn't stay awake for the life of me. ended up planning lessons during the classes when i was supposed to teach them.

tonight, i still have a ton of work to do, but it doesn't have to be done until noon tomorrow. yet, for some bizarre reason, my body has decided that right now, 2 o'clock in the morning, is a GREAT time to be wide awake and get work done. i'm actually accomplishing a lot, for the first time in several weeks.

i will never understand my internal clock. i believe it thinks i live in russia.

arrival

my best friend from high school has been happily married for nearly five years and had her second child this morning. in comparison, i had a longer relationship with my fish than 2/3 of my boyfriends. should this worry me somewhat?

regardless: welcome, lorelei! congratulations mer, cameron, and sam!

greetings from the wonderful world of eighth grade

connor: "i have a glass eye."
candace: "no you don't."
connor: "yes i do."
candace: "no you don't. it's moving."
connor: "yes i do. see. poke it. it's glass."
candace: "i don't want to poke your eye. it's not glass."
connor: "yes it is. seriously. poke it. it's glass."

{pause}

candace: *poke*
connor: "OW! OW! that hurt! i didn't think you'd really do it!"
me: *snort*

quotes of the week, courtesy of 4th period u.s. history

zim: "what color pen do you want us to use for the test?"
me: "blue or black ink"
zim: "all i have is green."
me: "then why did you ask?"


gabe: "why do they call them ivy league colleges?"
me: "because they have ivy growing on the buildings."
gabe: "sam! my shed is ivy league!"


and my personal favorite, said while in the middle of a discussion of the salem witch trials, voodoo, satanism, modern day witchcraft, and sorcery in the bible (don't ask...discussions like this just sort of happen in 4th period u.s. history):

sam: "in the rastafarian religion, they believe that marijuana gives you spiritual powers and that you need to have lots of children to pass on your ideas."
*pause*
dan: "so basically it's a religion built around smoking weed and having lots of sex."
me: "pretty much. you can't convert"

sister #2's opinion of government homework

carol: i'm doing my current event on the U.S. developing a 'death ray'
carol: i'm tired of writing about politics
carol: so i'm writing about a death ray

things i accomplished tonight

tonight i worked in the church nursery. while there, i:

1.) read picture books out loud for 45 minutes, approximately 35 minutes of which was spent paraphrasing so i wouldn't have to read anything that rhymed
2.) physically restrained the pastor's flailing 3-year-old while her mother bolted out the door, then sat with her while she screamed and clung to the doorjamb for 15 minutes
3.) successfully prevented a 7-month-old from using the doorstop as a chew toy

i'd say a job well done.

i also reconnected with the tale of peter rabbit. i'd forgotten what a delightful story that is.